I woke up this morning and forgot what day it was. Yes, I knew it was Sunday but until my computer loaded up and the date *September 30* popped up on the screen I had forgotten. Three years ago today at a little after 4 pm my world changed forever.

My diagnosis of cancer, now referred to as my first diagnosis of cancer was branded into my memory forever. The date itself has been a looming specter creeping onto my calender marking that one more year has passed since what I knew as normal disappeared. But as I opened my eyes and turned over in bed this morning I didn't know it was that day, nor had I gone to bed 8 hrs previous dreading it.
Could this be the best sign- that life is starting to normalize. The day is still one I will remember for the rest of my life but it does not define or interpret the meaning of my life. Explain this fact to someone who has not been a survivor of any serious chronic illness...it never leaves your lifestyle, yet it never diminishes your capacity to feel joy. It does not have to be the forefront of your thoughts but the impression it leaves on you is lasting. And it is a gift.

This Friday's Light the Night for The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society was great!
My team, Leah's Line-Up raised more than $2,000 for blood cancer patients. My special un-credited caregiver, Lucy, the chocloate lab joined us for the walk.

For those of you who know Lucy the pup came into my family's life as a direct result of my diagnosis with Hodgkins Lymphoma April 2006. I call her my "magic medicine", the "anti-chemo" and I credit her with saving my spirit. It was wonderful to find out she could join my band of supporters, providing she was leashed.
She's no longer a pup...and I'm no longer hairless, frail and being riddled with caustic drugs. Life has gone on. Poor dog...with all those people there she didn't get enough special TLC from her Leah. Awww, so today I will take Lucy to Dog Shangri-La at Ellison Park. Not a bad way to spend a day, eh?

Nostalgia is just a way of compensating for really crappy pop-culture

In the 1980s I was livin the high life.
I loved to chew Hubba Bubba Pink Lemonade bubble gum while riding my Pink Huffy Sweet Thunder bicycle (with the ultra cool extra cushiony luxury seat) up and down the driveway.
Back then things were really cookin'. I was sportin an ultra cool girl mullet. I wore a telephone cord belt and I had one of those three tiered skirts. The Fisher Price radio with attached mic was blasting the Bangles and Genesis and I sang to every song. Thankfully, by the early 90s the mullet was long gone and life went on. But if you ask me any line of Manic Monday I can still recite it. Impressive huh, I was eight years old when that song came out?

I missed the whole 80s coming of age thing, the teen scene. I was too busy throwing Barbie pool parties during the better part of the 80s. At least the movies showed me I was missing out on some real good times. Wax on Wax off... Who didn't envy Elizabeth Shue rollerskating around with Ralph Maccio (Daniel Son) in the Karate Kid, ya know? And Sixteen Candles.... Hello? It doesn't get any better than Jake Ryan!

But anyway, by the time the 90s rolled around...I realized I'd missed the boat. The teenaged guy getting the most attention wore suspenders, red oversized glasses and snorted heartily. His name was Steve Urkel.

Then when Joey Lawrence danced around in a wife beater and a flannel around his waist singing Nothin' My Love Can't Fix for ya Baby...it was grounds for despair. Triple threat, he was not.

Right then and there the teen idol should have been declared DOA. Granted Urkel later spiffed up and became Stef-fffan but I digress...this was what we had to work with in the early 90s....a whole lotta nothin.

Were there any decent teen idols in the 90s? Am I missing anyone? Please comment if you think I have unfairly assessed the hunk quotient of an entire decade.

Clean scan!


Yes, this is a very good thing.

Insomnia's effects on a worried brain

Today is the day I should get my scan results. And yes this post if it registers correctly was made at 3:35 AM.
I am worried. So there. Every now and then a little worry is okay to admit, right?
But I will distract myself with some rambling...the kind of rambling one does to avoid thinking about serious life altering scenarios.

Ponderable Questions

• Do you think Leona Helmsley's dog has a crystal chandellier in the dog house?
• How the hell do they attach Britney's hair extensions -wasn't the girl bald just 5 months ago?
• Do telemarketers accept calls from other telemarketers?
• Can you get workers comp from a papercut if it becomes infected and disables you?
• No solicitors. Are girl scouts peddling those cute yummy cookies considered solicitors?
• There is no i in team...who comes up with this bull?

Just saying...

• West Nile virus really isn't that exotic if your Egyptian.
• The pet rock, doggie steps, spray on hair...modern marvels!
• The inventor of the Flowbee was in cahoots with the developer of the Mullet hairstyle.
• You're a roadie. The rock life is in your blood. Now...imagine your next assignment is a Hanson show.
• The running man...ahhhh I miss this dance move.
• The beret...this could have made a comeback. Great job, Monica Lewinsky!

Alright, now I'm just going to try to get some sleep...I have successfully distracted myself.